Blogging · funny · Me myself and I · Thoughts

Holy spam!

This weekend, I’m doing the 5am shift… Need I say more? I don’t like that shift, I’ve said it many, many many many times. But this time of year, it sucks even more, because the sun just won’t rise, and I get weirdly jealous that it gets three whole hours of nighttime more than me!

Fortunately, yesterday night, I managed to sleep early (well… early for me) and I am in fairly good shape this morning. Not meaning I was in the mood for a good day of work when I entered the building, but that’s why we have The Internets and the Bloggosphere…

So I just scrolled through my Reader to get my share of good (too early) morning giggles, and I got served! Ellen, from Notes from the UK wrote a great post about her spam folder. Her story not only made me laugh a good deal, but it made me think too (yes, I do that… sometimes) (and yes, I know, I use a lot of parentheses this morning) (deal with it!) (I do what I want! – This is MY blog!!)

So!…

I went looking in my spam folder. I must admit I hadn’t paid attention to it in a long while, and I was disappointed in myself for two reasons. First, because I launched a Free Non Spam Spammed Comments Campain last year, and I failed to keep a close follow up on my own spam. Second, because I realized I had good stuff lying there, waiting.

As I remember it, aside from the “non spam spam”, my spam used to be mainly messages (most probably computer-generated) that proposed links to websites supposed to improve my blog. Or messages (in a very questionable English) that complimented my posts, although not referring to anything I said in the post.

I don’t get “enlarge your blog” spam comments anymore… Maybe because The Cove doesn’t need any more help from the spam-world? I am kind of flattered! Nope, since my last visit to my spam file, spammers seem to have become more creative!

First, I have one comment in Portuguese. I thought the Google Translation would already make my day, but it was disappointingly accurate and clear… Here’s the comment, in English (duh!)

 Write more, that’s all I have to say. Literally, it looks like you’ve relied on the video to your point of view. You clearly know what you are talking about, for who waste your wits on just posting videos on your blog, when you could be giving us something enlightening to read?

I wanted to feel flattered. I really did. I love been called “witty”, it’s just a soft spot of mine, and I wanted to reply and thank the “reader” for his/her clear interest in my writing! But (there’s always a “but”) there was no video in the post… Which kind of ruined my enthusiasm.

Where it becomes really creative, is a series of comments, on different posts, that, put together, almost look like a story. Most of them are from “Jack” which seems like a pretty legit comment-maker, wouldn’t you say? So here are the mysterious messages left by Jack…

Daddy yօu didn?t say what thee very best thing about God is.
Its importawnt to play too.

WE WILL.? Thhey both shhouted and thry ran to the bed room Ьickring about
who ets to go firѕt.

Mommy and Daddy hugged the twіns as a result of it was getting time to gget to bed.
?Mommy thinks thhe most effective factor about God is hhe
gave mee these two little rascals and theyre the pегfect factor in Mommy?s world.?
She stated cuddling and tickling bboth boys. That was the form of factor mommies all tһe time sаy.
Тhe giggled and hugged Mommy and ave been vіrtually ready
too go to their bunk beds when Ꮮee ѕaid.

I bet hhe iѕ PERFECT at it!? Laughed Larry.

Okay,? Lee saіɗ after which he stopped and
thought. ?One of the best factor about God is ???
hmmmm?????..?He phzzlеd as a result of he had so many issᥙes that had been great abⲟut God however he neeⅾed to choose
one of the best one so he ᴡouⅼd wwin thе game.
?That he is awaгe of everythіng. That?s really cool.
Meaning he may heⅼp me with my homework.? Larrу concludeԀ with a pr᧐ud expression on his face.

Ӏ do know!? Mentіoned Larry. ?I guess he likes angels aѕ a result off
he has tyem around аll the time. Maybe he and the angels plɑy family gamеs like we do sometimes.
Possibly they рlay Monopoly.? This made Mommy gigցle aϲtually hard.

Үoull be able to play it anytіme you want.? Daddy answered.
?As a гesult of talking ɑbout how great God
is makeѕ him completely satisfied and its worship. Play it earlier than you go to slеep tonight and wһile yoᥙ wakе uр wіthin the morning and God
willl be near you all day long.

I’m a little disappointed I didn’t check before… I have a feeling I had other bits and pieces of Larry and Lee’s story, that got deleted because they had been sitting in my file for too long…

I will be checking regularly now.

Keep posted if you want to know more about Angels playing Monopoly and the like…

 

2 thoughts on “Holy spam!

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