Blogging · funny · Me myself and I · Thoughts

Too much information.

I really like crafting.

Wether it is a very simple project, or something more intricate, I enjoy working with my hands, and being creative.

Recently, I was given a crafting kit. It seemed pretty simple, at first sight, and the result would be a cute little pink felt wool lamb:

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I emptied the little package, to find the following;

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So, a little bag of white, pink and red wool, beads for the eyes, and two disturbingly sharp needles. Seriously, I can hardly figure why they felt the need to make these needle so sharp. They almost look dangerous.

Oh, and, of course, instructions:

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Now, I never claimed to be a genius, which I am not. But I usually am smart enough to figure my way out of this kind of instruction sheet. I built many Ikea pieces of furniture by myself, and never had any problem doing so. Ok, I occasionally finished with an extra screw in hand, but nothing worse ever happened.

I must say that this sheet left me a bit lost.

I get that a picture is usually worth a thousand words. But here…??  I thought that written instructions may be on the back of the paper…

 

20190314_115945

 

Nope!

So here is my take on the 18 (easy) steps to get this little lamb done…

 

  1. Get stuff out of the box. (Be careful while handling the dang sharp needles!!)
  2. Poke white wool with one sharp-as-hell needle.
  3. Shape white wool into a ball. Stare at it for a while (while trying to figure step 4, obviously!)
  4. Poke a little bit of red wool into the white wool ball.
  5. Pick up white ball. Stare at it wondering how a red ”X” appeared on it??
  6. Poke the useless styrofoam cube with one of the dangerously sharp needles. (Preferably in the upper-right corner. Oh! Stare at it for a moment too.)
  7. Put two strands of white wool on the table.
  8. Poke one of the strands of white wool onto the styrofoam cube.
  9. Magically get 4 strands of white wool on the table now. Wonder if the sharp needles are magic wands for a while.
  10. Put white ball next to the 5 strands of white wool on the table. Poke the white ball to stop the apparition of new white strands.
  11. Oh! You blinked! We’re not telling you how most of the work got done mysteriously between steps 10 and 11. Stare in wonderment.
  12. Take the beard-shaped strand of pink wool, and poke white ball near the red ”X”. Don’t use your fingers to hold the needle – too dangerous!
  13. Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke! Poke!
  14. Stare at the result… Hey! Wait! We forgot the eyes!!
  15. Use not included tool to point at eyes… Magic gun should do the trick!
  16. See???  (Pun intended) Stare a little bit!
  17. Poke lamb in the head, running white string from one side through the other.
  18. Ta-daaaaaaaa!

 

I’ll let you all know, if I ever manage to make something resembling the expected result… But in all honesty, I doubt that will happen! LOL

12 thoughts on “Too much information.

    1. I had never seen these memes before, but I did a quick search and OMG! Mouahahahahahahahahahahahaha Exactly my point! I think I’ll try to take pictures at every stage, to make the same collage 😛 *fingers crossed*

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I admire you! The first thing that I typically discard are the directions. Check that. It’s the 2nd thing I discard. The first thing is the warranty. So, after I botch things up, I’m not covered.

    Like

  2. oh golly! I get those directions all the time..and never get it right, no matter what I am trying to make. So, now? I throw the directions away and just play.

    Like

  3. OMG! Laughing my ass off here. Let me guess, this package states that it’s for ages 5+. Hide the five-year-olds from those nasty needles. Truly funny post!!😁 😂 🤣🐑 Question, how did you not turn the white ball of fluff red without pricking the hell out of your fingers?

    Liked by 1 person

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