.

Bent over the table, a sigh escaped her pouting lips while she stared at the pen in her hand.

This is ridiculous – she thought to herself. Why was she so nervous? She had gone through the pros and cons of writing to him several times, and her mind was clear now.

With a deep breath, she chased her last doubts away, and started scribbling…

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Dear Dylan,

My heart rushes, as I write these lines… To say that I am terrified would be an understatement.  I can’t stand the thought that this might destroy the friendship and the complicity we’ve built over time.  But when you confronted me the last time we met, I realized that I owed you the truth.

Even if I know it might be the end of whatever ”us” is….

First of all, forgive me for having kept elusive at the time. I just wasn’t ready to tell you, just yet. When you asked why I was acting weird lately, I didn’t know what to say. You caught me by surprise, because I really thought you were totally oblivious to the signs.

I want to appologize again. I didn’t want this to happen. I swear I didn’t. But you are such a sweet guy, so brilliant, so funny. We’ve spent so much time together, sharing hopes and dreams, and all the little things about our lives. I just got caught in your intricate spider-web.

I am so sorry, SO sorry to disappoint you. I hope you won’t take it as a treason. But in a way, you’re the one to blame for being so terribly cute. No, I take that back… You’re not just cute, you are totally handsome, and I don’t know how I managed not to get attracted to you before.

So you might have seen this coming, but my dear Dylan… I love you!

It wasn’t supposed to happen, and we both know it won’t take us anywhere. Even you felt the same (which I highly doubt), we know what stands between us. And there is no reason to mess with that.

But yes, I love you. With no superlative.

So there you go. I’ll be wishing and hoping that you don’t get scared of my admitted feelings. Please understand that they are not threatening in any way. And if you don’t get it, I’ll understand. I’ll hurt, but I’ll understand.

Love (obviously).

.

And she signed her letter.

Folding the piece of paper that she would leave on Dylan’s desk next time she’d be working from the office, she wiped a tear. If only they had met as teenagers, when they were both single. If only they had hooked up in the corridors of a nameless highschool building, exchanging glances. If only this conversation had happened after the graduation ball.

Dear Dylan – she thought… I would have done anything to win you over…

Staring at the folded letter, she slipped it in her purse pouch.

No need for him to know – she whispered, to herself. I think I’ll just tell him I was under the weather in a casual way. It might do the trick.

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Fandango’s Flash Fiction Challenge