“The Danish way of life is marked by punctuality, modesty and above all equality”

This is a quote from a website I visited, that sums up perfectly the way I see typical Danes. I know that not all Danes are like that, but there is a profound feeling of equality and respect that I’ve felt from the interaction I had with Danes.

Respect. I think it is the key word to describe Danes. They respect others, and expect the same respect in return. and it has so many levels…

I’ve learned not to compliment them too much. Here, people compliment one another naturally and it is often just a nice thing to do. Pretty much everybody enjoys being complimented, and some of us crave marks of appreciation… Not Danes! Too much spotlight makes them uncomfortable, and often I get my compliments mirrored back (Me: «you’re a great help in my learning of Danish” Most probable answer: “Thanks, I don’t have that much to do with it, you are a good learner”)

Danes just aren’t into the superficial interest we share without even noticing it. Best example: A-NY-WHERE you go in Québec, if you enter a store, or a restaurant, the most likely greeting to your arrival would be to ask you how you are doing. We ask everybody how they are doing all the time… and we don’t expect much more of an answer than “good, thanks!” Danes will only ask you “Hvordan går det?” if they are truly interested in having a developed answer. When you think about it, isn’t it the best way to go? Why open a door to depressed people you don’t care about? Or why take a chance to get into an endless conversation when you just don’t have time for it? When a Dane asks you how you are doing, it is because he/she really wants to know.

The third point of my quote, “ponctuality” directly comes from the respect Danes have for people and expect in return. Being punctual is merely a repercussion of their high respect of others. You just don’t make people wait.

And you don’t get into a Dane’s bubble all that easy. I’ll come back on this one, because there is a lot of meat on the bone, but for now, just take my word for it. I don’t like the word “taming” it doesn’t reflect what I mean… the right word in French would be “apprivoiser”. Danes have to be “apprivoisés”. Like the fox in St-Exupéry’s “Little Prince”…  I don’t know why, but I really feel a link between the two…

“I am looking for friends. What does that mean — tame?”

“It is an act too often neglected,” said the fox. “It means to establish ties.”

“To establish ties?”

“Just that,” said the fox. “To me, you are still nothing more than a little boy who is just like a hundred thousand other little boys. And I have no need of you. And you, on your part, have no need of me. To you I am nothing more than a fox like a hundred thousand other foxes. But if you tame me, then we shall need each other. To me, you will be unique in all the world. To you, I shall be unique in all the world….”
― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, The Little Prince

Today, I feel like I have 3 foxes… And my heart is warm!