When I sat down to write this post, I thought that Marquessa was crazy. How could I ever find twelve things I wish I had learnt about earlier in my life? That wasn’t going to happen, and I was ready to fail the challenge for the first time in twenty six days. But you know what? I finally filled all twelve spots, and here they are…
That there is (almost) always a silver lining. Yes, there is, if you are willing to see it. It might not be obvious at first, but if you give it some time, and you are truly openhearted, you’ll find something positive that came out of the worst of situations.
That there is more to cheese than just cheap cheddar and mozzarella. When I was a child, cheese meant these industrial yellowish bricks that came in a subtle variety of shades, but that all basically tasted the same. Nothing to get excited about. One day, I fell in love with a French young man, went to visit him, and discovered real cheese. I eventually lost the fiancé, but not my love for cheese!
That you can’t help someone not ready for help. I used to want to help no matter what. Until one of my close friends went through severe depression, and got to the point where he was suicidal. I thought that if he had someone to talk to, he would hang on, and eventually get a little better. As the days went by, I realized that he was dragging me down with him instead. So I had to put my feet down and take a step back. I made it clear that I would stand by him and help him anytime he would need me to… But that he had to be ready for help first.
That dreams can come true, if you’re willing to work hard enough. I know that not all dreams can come true. But most dreams can be reached. You just have to be ready to make the sacrifices to get them. Winners find ways, losers find excuses. Choose your camp!
To stay away from toxic people. Because they will feed on your energy, as long as you let them. And they don’t deserve that. And you don’t deserve to feel like sh*t just because they are not happy with their lives. Even if they do have their qualities, none will be great enough to compensate. Toxic people have to be shown the way out. Period.
To trust my gut instinct. Just like the awesome Roxette song said, you should always listen to your heart. There is a reason we have this inner voice that sometimes disagrees with our rational decisions. And I’ve realized, over the years, that listening to it often opens doors I wouldn’t have imagined, or get me out of trouble in unexpected ways… We can’t understand it? Who cares?
That I would never learn to like coffee or eggs. Both are things that almost everybody seems to enjoy, so I thought that if I tried every once in a while, I would end up liking them too. But it just never happened, and I give up. No, I won’t drink coffee (no matter how much sugar and/or milk you put in it) and I won’t eat eggs. That’s it.
That no matter what I do, some people won’t like me. It is simply impossible to please everybody. I prefer to spend my energy on the people who like me as I am. Bending backwards to please people that won’t truly appreciate me anyway is just absurd.
That struggle is necessary, in Life. Facing difficult times is not fun, and we certainly don’t go looking for trouble. But we need to ”train” at an early age, otherwise we couldn’t put up with all the adversity we have to face as adults. As the saying goes, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.
That hapiness lies in the little things. Aspiring to being absolutely and completely happy is impossible. There will always be a little cloud in your sky, that will cast a shadow on your sunny day. Instead of having big plans, notice the little things that make a difference. You might not find yourself happy at all times, but you will be more often!
That letting go doesn’t mean giving up. Some people just won’t take ”no” for an answer. But you can’t win every fight you engage in. You’re just a human. Sometimes, you have you choose your battles. And the ones you decide not to fight all the way don’t become failures, just energy put in a better place.
That Denmark is just A-w-E-s-O-m-E. Can you imagine if I had discovered Denmark as a teenager?? I probably would have traveled there over twenty times by now… I’d be fluent in Danish, and who knows, I maybe would have found a way to live there… Oh! *sigh*
What about you? What are some things you now wish you had learnt earlier in your life? If you’d like to read Marquessa’s thoughts about it, click here.